The Big Bang Theory’s wedding episode succeeded where Publix failed

Most of us strive for perfection. Some of us do it too hard, and it can affect our well-being.

On the other hand, there are people who just don’t know any better, or worse, don’t care.

devil clip art

I don’t watch TV nearly as much as I used to, especially newer shows, shows not on network TV, etc. One day, I’ll be asking you for advice on being a cord-cutter.

(Unless any of you in the Philadelphia area are experts on watching by streaming over the internet. But how do you get the internet without Comcast in a high-rise when Comcast is the only option?)

the big bang theory logo
CBS

Anyway, I was writing a blog when Sheldon and Amy got married on The Big Bang Theory but watched it on demand over the weekend.

I’ll quote this website to catch you up.

“Leonard is getting emotional helping his buddy get ready. Leonard is happy for Sheldon and that he will be officially and legally Amy’s problem. Ahh. Sheldon adds that he will always be Leonard’s problem.”

Then, Mary Cooper comes in and asks for a moment with her son, Sheldon.

After that, Sheldon describes to Amy,

“how her comments about imperfection in his bow tie makes him want to add the imperfections of the real world into his string theory calculations. Amy then calls his work super asymmetry and he likes that.”

Obviously, the importance of perfection depends what you’re doing.

None of us will be perfect in life, or in any particular part of it. That’s what makes us human. We can and should strive to improve in areas we particularly need it.

Which is why regular readers know I get angry when I see fellow journalists messing up or unwilling to fix their mistakes — especially former colleagues who know better.

Publix logo exterior

That said, look at the Publix bakery. Publix is a big Florida supermarket and expanded into other southeastern states, where fed-up Floridians went when they became former Floridians.

The Miami Herald reports Publix decided “to censor a high school student’s graduation cake” when a South Carolina mom “said she ordered a Publix cake online for her son, Jacob, 18, last weekend to celebrate his summa cum laude designation. She intended the frosting to read: ‘Congrats Jacob! Summa Cum Laude class of 2018.’”

Wow! Ordering a cake online!

Come to think of it, The Herald reports that was the problem!

Mom had gone out of her way when ordering the cake to make sure everything would go right and Publix would accomplish just a tiny fraction of what her son did – reading, baking and spelling.

But…

“A computerized Publix algorithm that trolls cake inscription requests for naughty words didn’t like the Latin word ‘cum’ — pronounced coom — which means ‘with.’

“The centuries-old phrase translates to ‘with the highest distinction’ or ‘praise.’ So the cake maker followed the computer’s instruction — despite (proud Mom’s) explanation of the Latin phrase in the ‘special instructions’ column of the order form — and instead decorated the cake with ‘Congrats Jacob! Summa — Laude class of 2018.’

“The Latin preposition for ‘with’ was replaced by dashes.”

Instead, she “went on Facebook to tell everyone how embarrassing it was to have to explain to her son and 70-year-old mom the other meaning of that preposition when used as English slang.”

cum cake Facebook

Brilliant Jacob may not be as brilliant as credited, or it may say a lot about his graduating class, if he looked at the actual word by itself and had no idea it may have an alternative meaning.

Come to think of it (I couldn’t resist using that phrase a second time and I’m able to), The Washington Post reported Jacob attended a Christian-based home-school program and earned a 4.89 grade point average.

Last night, Stephen Colbert went off on Publix on “The Late Show” and was able to present “another graduation treat made for Jacob — cupcakes with the offending (to Publix) word as decorative frosting,” as The Herald put it.

Blame CBS, not me, if you see a commercial.

I’ll bet he didn’t have to travel to Times Square — a few blocks south of the Ed Sullivan Theater — to have them made, either.

According to The Post, Mom called Publix and the assistant manager offered to remake the cake.

“No,” the paper reported she said. “You only graduate once.”

But she may have ended up smiling financially.

Publix refunded $70 for the cake and gave her a store gift card.

Just don’t try it with Publix, yourself.

The Post wrote it “replicated her experience and got the same result.”

publix cake form
The Washington Post

So the tie Sheldon wore at his wedding in The Big Bang Theory may not have been tied perfectly. That’s not a big deal in the scheme of things. Besides, by the time anyone important (besides Mark Hamill) would see him close-up, there would’ve been plenty of time and movement for the perfect tie to become imperfect. So he gets away with it while dressed better than most of the guys on the show, most of the time, anyway. (And it would probably have been corrected for pictures.)

But as Jacob’s mom said, “You only graduate once,” and she said she explained the situation to the Publix assistant manager because she didn’t want this to happen to anyone else in the future.

Unfortunately,

“as The Washington Post test revealed, that particular ‘c’ word remains profane by Publix standards.”

So nothing was learned. Try putting it on your next license plate instead.

P.S. I have another reward for reading all the way!

In an exclusive, unaired clip from The Big Bang Theory Season 11 finale, the happy couple gets one last wedding present from the late theoretical physicist Stephen Hawking.

Hawking died in March. I posted a Facebook article with thoughts then.

hawking
https://www.haaretz.com/israel-news/stephen-hawking-s-complicated-relationship-with-israel-1.5906160

Also, I’ll give you these two articles on how the scientist was so misguided on that topic.

And from the same day:

Stephen Hawking reaffirms support of Israel boycott: Hawking sends letter to President’s Conference organizers saying he faced pressure to withdraw from Palestinian academics (Jerusalem Post, May 8, 2013)

Please, if you like what you read here, subscribe to CohenConnect.com with either your email address or WordPress account, and get a notice whenever I publish.

P.S. Just wanted to make sure no connection between words in Summa Cum Laude and The Big Bang Theory was implied.

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Parkland now, but North Miami Beach proud!

Did I just write that headline?

There’s lots on my mind (too often, and that’s between me and my medical professional, and I’ll get to the rest another time), but I’m going to limit myself to what just happened in southern and northern Florida over the past few days, since last week’s massacre at Marjory Stoneman Douglas High School.

feature

You may recognize the young man on the left. He’s more than a survivor. His mother has been a friend since we sat next to each other in 7th grade science class.

Cameron wanted to know if Sen. Marco Rubio (R-Fla.), on the right, would agree to refuse further political contributions from the National Rifle Association. I know Natalie is very, very proud of her son’s persistence (and was so relieved last week).

Watch from a CNN Town Hall what it takes for Cameron to try to get a simple “yes” or “no” answer to his question from a sitting U.S. senator and former presidential candidate from his own state!

Future lawyer here, I hope.

Then, the website Scary Mommy described the exchange as,

“You can almost feel Rubio biting back the phrases, ‘Because I said so!’ and ‘Go to your room!’ in this clip. He’s a 46-year-old career politician who just got schooled by a teenager whose biggest concern right now should be who he’s taking to prom. Instead he’s been thrust into the national spotlight as a leader of a major movement, and doing a fantastic job spreading their message.”

Honestly, I could probably never do as well offering up an opinion as author Megan Zander did, so I’ll let her continue.

“Fox News host Todd Starnes watched the exchange and was not pleased. But it wasn’t the Second Amendment issues at play that made Starnes angry. It was Kasky’s behavior as a teen speaking to an adult that rubbed him the wrong way. He took to Twitter to ask parents how they’d feel if their own child did what Kasky had just done.”

Again, from Megan Zander:

“To be clear, nothing Kasky said or did is even close to rude, let alone disrespectful. He addresses Senator Rubio as Senator. He doesn’t scream, he doesn’t curse. He even asks the crowd to settle down multiple times so Rubio can be heard and the discussion can continue. He even offers to contribute personally to Rubio’s campaign if the Senator will agree to stop accepting NRA funds.

“Does he speak passionately? Absolutely. He’s allowed to be passionate about the fact that 15 of his classmates and two of his teachers were murdered, and others injured. But he’s not being hostile — he’s pleading with his elected official for a straight answer on the question of whether he’ll continue to take monies from an organization that thinks mass loss of life is a fair exchange so others can own assault rifles for fun.

“If Starnes was hoping Twitter would assure him that Kasky deserved to be grounded indefinitely for his behavior, he miscalculated horribly.”

I can assure you Natalie is damn proud and posted this, that she borrowed:

marjory

But sorry, ladies. My favorite social media post of the day is this one:

=====

Ain’t it great when politicians from both sides of the aisle get along! Two days in the Florida legislature:

Tuesday, the legislature declared pornography to be a public health risk. I tweeted about that. Oh, and it also voted against a measure to consider banning the sale of assault weapons.

3 LAWMAKERS
The Three Stooges lawmakers: Rep. Daniels, Rep. Ponder, Sen. Perry (from their state websites)

Wednesday, two of the same good folks elected to go to Tallahassee — Democratic Rep. Kimberly Daniels of Jacksonville and Republican Rep. Mel Ponder of Destin — got their bill “H.B. 839: The Display of the State Motto” passed by a wide margin.

It would requires each district school board to adopt rules for display of official state motto “In God We Trust” in specified places. It passed, 97-10, and is identical to a bill — S.B. 1158 — introduced by Republican Sen. Keith Perry of Gainesville. The Senate has done nothing with the bill since it was introduced Jan. 9. Rep. Daniels was first to file it last Nov. 29.

in God we trust bill

This is the law as it stands now. Statute 1003.44 is called “Patriotic programs; rules” and it mainly describes the Pledge of Allegiance, and other historic material school boards may let any teacher or administrator read or post. If passed, starting July 1, the motto must be displayed “in a conspicuous place” in all schools and all buildings used by the school board. You can define “conspicuous” or let a judge.

Rep. Daniels lists her occupation as “Author/International Speaker,” went to “Florida State University; Jacksonville Theological Seminary,” but calls her religious affiliation “Non-denominational.” So I guess she’s not Jewish. (Sigh of relief.) Before the vote, she referred to God as “the light. And our schools need light in them like never before.”

Rep. Ponder lists his occupation as “President of a workplace ministry, Real Estate Agent.” (So definitely not.) And Sen. Perry has received awards from the American Conservative Union (Christian).

According to Wikipedia, “In God We Trust”

“was adopted as the nation’s motto in 1956 as a replacement or alternative to the unofficial motto of E pluribus unum, which was adopted when the Great Seal of the United States was created and adopted in 1782. … It is also the motto of the U.S. state of Florida.”

Just Florida.

The day of the national change, during the Cold War, President Dwight Eisenhower also signed into law a requirement that “In God We Trust” be printed on all U.S. currency and coins.

Earlier, President Theodore Roosevelt had called using God’s name on money to be sacrilege.

FYI, both Republicans (of course, in name, 50 years apart).

Your JOB is to read well past the headline

OK, I may be a day late (and I’m definitely a dollar short, these days), but I read three articles on jobs, yesterday morning — on companies we all know — and they were a whole lot different when I read between the lines.

dollar treedollar general

First, Yahoo reported in “Dollar Stores hammered by Trump proposal to abandon food stamps” how shares of Dollar Tree and Dollar General, which it owns, dropped Monday because of President Trump’s proposed budget.

The share drop may be true and abandoning SOME food stamps may also be true, but there’s a lot more to the story.

(Only picky eaters like me would starve if I was part of the program.)

generic newspaper

Trump wants to reduce food-stamp benefits and Yahoo calls it, “Potentially one of the biggest shake-ups in the history of the Supplemental Nutrition Assistance Program, or SNAP,” which is what we used to (or still) call food stamps.

Donald Trump squeeze money

But it shouldn’t be as bad for the poor as you may think at first. The plan is to cut cash payments and substitute the money for packages of actual food.

How many of you ever wondered what the person ahead of you in the checkout line was doing buying “that” with food stamps? The president’s plan should put that question to rest.

food stamp signfood stamps

Nearly 42.2 million people reportedly got food stamps during the 2017 fiscal year. Those receiving more than $90 a month would get a food-aid package including shelf-stable milk, peanut butter, cereal and meat.

usda logoOf course, many of Dollar Tree and Dollar General’s customers are the least wealthy and getting food means they won’t have to (or be able to go out and) buy what they want anymore. With the government’s buying scale, they may even get more.

One analyst Yahoo quoted said those stores “have signaled that food stamps account for roughly five percent of sales,” but the whole grocery industry could be affected.

 

The plan to overhaul SNAP would save a projected $214 billion over a decade.

barnes and noble

Next is a store — no, make that an industry — that has been in trouble for years: book stores. CNBC’s headline is “Barnes & Noble cuts staff after dismal holiday season” and none of us should be surprised, considering competition from Amazon.

Unless you need a book right away — right, students? – you can probably go online and get it (along with everything else Amazon sells) cheaper, and delivered right to your door.

kid readingkids reading

That’s great, but not for booksellers. Employees are often experts but now the chain is reportedly laying off lead cashiers, digital leads and other experienced workers, company-wide. In fact, many of them showed up for work Monday and were told they no longer had a job.

Way to go, Barnes & Noble! That’ll do well for the psyche of your remaining employees, who know they don’t have many similar jobs available.

borders books

CNBC reported, “The number of affected workers couldn’t immediately be determined” but we know there are way fewer stores than there were years ago, too many people living far from one, and Borders? Forget it. Dead since the end of 2010. That stinks on every level.

Whose parents didn’t take them to the bookstore as a kid, just to browse or even choose something you’d want? That’s practically just a memory.

The business channel called consumer spending “generally strong this holiday season” but Barnes & Noble holiday sales fell more than 6 percent from the year before.

walmartAmazon isn’t only competition online. It — with its low-price reputation — is also opening up more of its own bricks-and-mortar bookstores.

Then there’s the self-proclaimed low-price leader. Walmart is not just stealing “a larger share of the books market.” It’s “planning to make a massive push in selling e-books and e-readers on Walmart.com later this year.”

If only literacy and education were the goals of these big American companies. Shareholders, rejoice!

amazon

And speaking of Amazon, CNN’s headline was “Amazon lays off hundreds of employees” but that doesn’t make sense at all considering its seventh paragraph:

“It appears the company isn’t looking to reduce its overall headcount. It currently has 3,900 open corporate job listings in Seattle and 12,000 open positions worldwide, which point to the company’s ‘aggressive’ hiring plans.”

firedSo what’s really going on?

According to CNN’s source, “The majority of the layoffs are affecting the company’s Seattle headquarters, but some global teams may be affected as well.”

Online retail operations are expected to be hit the hardest and employees are already being notified.

usps amazon

But I thought Amazon was doing very well, especially when it came to the holiday season and stealing so much of the book business from Barnes & Noble.

It absolutely is.

Apparently, Amazon has “aggressive” hiring plans even after adding 130,000 jobs in the past year (not including the new ones from Whole Foods). It has 3,900 open corporate job listings in Seattle and 12,000 open positions worldwide. That 12,000 figure doesn’t come close to including workers at the company’s second headquarters — which Philadelphia made the top 20 in landing.

usps pkgAmazon said, according to CNN, “HQ2 will cost a minimum of $5 billion to construct and operate, and will create as many as 50,000 jobs.” That’s way more than 12,000.

How well is Amazon doing? It reported nearly $2 billion in profit in its latest quarter from the holiday shopping season. That’s not only the largest in its history but the first time it topped $1 billion in a quarter!

But what about those employee layoffs in the headline and how readers were supposed to feel? Amazon said in a statement sent to CNN:

“As part of our annual planning process, we are making headcount adjustments across the company — small reductions in a couple of places and aggressive hiring in many others. … For affected employees, we work to find roles in the areas where we are hiring.”

whole foods market

So now, with Whole Foods in its arsenal, we’ll see what Amazon will be able to perform next. Maybe get the government contract on those food-aid packages that are replacing SNAP/food stamps. I’d count out producing pink slips!

perkins lenny come to work
Thanks to Leslie for finding this!

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The rights of TV station owners vs. the public

tv news advertising

By now, I’m sure you realize I’m a fan of the underdog. Fly, Philadelphia Eagles, fly!

I also strongly believe in holding people in high positions accountable for their acts, even off the clock. Can’t deny that after the recent string of sexual harassment allegations and confessions from some of the smartest and most talented people in America.

That’s why I reacted so strongly when I saw this article by the editor of TVNewsCheck, one of several industry websites.

I’ve written articles condemning the loosening of many regulatory protections, like net neutrality.

Harry Jessell, who I tried to reach privately on LinkedIn (I always try to reach somebody privately before writing about them), wrote a column called “End Discriminatory Regs Against Broadcast” and it’s exactly what you may expect.

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He argued TV stations face too many rules and that Sinclair Broadcast Group should not have to pay a tentative $13.4 million fine to the Federal Communications Commission for “allegedly airing news programming that was paid for by a sponsor.”

fcc federal communications commission

Keep in mind, Sinclair owns 193 TV stations in 89 cities. See if they’re on the air where you live. They may be soon! Not too shabby!

sinclair before tribune
from http://sbgi.net/tv-stations/

That’s because FCC rules were recently loosened — reportedly cheered on by President Trump — so it can buy the Tribune Media stations around the country. That’ll get Sinclair’s controversial perspective on a tremendous number of new screens in big cities like New York, Los Angeles, Chicago, Philadelphia and Miami, among others, for the first time. Not too sympathetic!

It just bought Bonten Media Group‘s five stations including WCYB in the Tri-Cities of TN/VA, where I used to work. Click here and see how the WCYB website’s look seemed to change overnight. It’s like everything is becoming the same and there’s no need nor room for creativity. (Try to be creative and risk being kicked out, even if you’re specifically asked for suggestions during your interview. Companies want their own style and tone.)

wcyb
www.wcyb.com

Sinclair requires conservative commentaries sent from its Maryland headquarters to air during its stations’ local newscasts. That causes viewers to think the biased people they see every night, tossed to by their local anchors, are local as well.

In 2004, Sinclair barred the ABC affiliates it owned from airing the episode of Nightline that profiled American soldiers killed overseas. (It owns stations affiliated with all of the networks.) The same year, it tried to get its stations to carry a pre-election film that bashed presidential candidate John Kerry. (Some might even say the First Amendment guaranteeing freedom of speech is only for station owners, not employees nor the public.)

sinclair broadcast group

Its gargantuan size already has liberals worried about its influence on elections.

tv owner population share
http://www.biakelsey.com

Jessell called the “sponsored news” rule antiquated and discriminatory, and claimed “native advertising has been around forever” under “names like advertorial, sponsored content, promoted content and infomercial.”

He also said it’s everywhere, and that print and digital media companies even get paid to invent it.

Plus, the rules may have been OK decades ago when broadcasters were becoming more powerful, rather than today when they face new competition from “aggressive digital giants.”

And he trusts viewers will eventually spot the advertising and change channels or media.

But I disagree. First, I don’t give viewers as much credit. There needs to be a separation — between news and opinion, as well as advertising — and I’d hate to be a journalist losing credibility by following Sinclair’s unique requirements.

I do admit with more competition, a broadcast license is no longer a license to print money as it used to be.

tv airwaves

But the airwaves belong to the public. TV stations have special responsibilities. Owners who don’t like them should be in a different business.

Anybody can print a newspaper, start a website, or even shoot material for a cable channel if they can get it carried.

Meanwhile, broadcasters get special protection like must-carry on cable systems, or they can demand money to be carried — which is much more common. (Then, of course, the network they’re affiliated with will demand a chunk of cash. It’s called reverse compensation.)

There used to be strict limits as to how many stations an owner can own. They’ve practically disappeared. Orders come from out of the area.

Owners were not allowed to own two stations in the same city. Now they can under certain circumstances.

Owners were not allowed to own two stations in neighboring cities (a grade-B overlap), since people who live in between can pick up both. Now they can.

Station owners are fighting like hell to be able to own newspapers. I believe the only one allowed without being grandfathered in that was OK was WNYW-Fox 5 in New York. Otherwise, the New York Post would’ve gone out of business. But then Fox also bought WWOR-Channel 9 and got rid of its news department — a big blow to New Jersey. (Fox’s newspaper business was later spun off into a different company.)

new york post
from WikiVisually

You give them an inch and they ask for a foot!

Look at this example in an ad on Rick Gevers & Associates’ website and newsletter!

many stations

That’s six stations and not a joke!

The two Democrats on the five-member FCC pretty much called the Sinclair fine peanuts because Sinclair aired the sponsored content 1,723 times on 77 stations, has had trouble with the FCC before and grossed $2.7 billion in revenue last year. The fine could’ve been $82 million.

Go to the article’s website and check out the comments. My favorite:

Fair enough Harry. (1) Remove broadcasters’ FCC licenses. (2) Charge broadcasters 8% of gross annual revenue for the right to transmit on the public airwaves. (3) Remove all special treatment regarding cable/satellite “must carry and retrans.”

Jessell’s response:

1) broadcasters could police airwaves privately; 2) station owners paid plenty for most of their frequencies; few got them for free; 3) retrans could be privatized and broadcasters would get the same amount of money. I have no love of must carry.

Did you notice the first part? Somebody else commented:

Broadcasters POLICE THEMSELVES??? haaaaaaaa, hysterical

And that person commented in a separate post:

Harry Jessell – is this particular article “End Discriminatory Regs Against Broadcast” – PAID FOR, in any way, shape or form?

What I wrote (using my own name):

Broadcasters use the public airwaves. Unlike other media, the airwaves broadcasters use belong to the people. They need to be protected, and the government has every right to regulate broadcasters in exchange for letting them use those airwaves. Throughout the decades, the government has been more and more lenient with broadcasters, letting them own more and more stations, and in closer proximity to each other, and licencing them for a longer time. If broadcasters don’t like it, then they should give up using the public’s airwaves that don’t belong to them and get into one of those other businesses you mentioned. Then they won’t have to worry about public service.

I think Sinclair should consider itself lucky. Very lucky.

I hope the underdog Eagles are as lucky in the NFC Championship against Minnesota and make it to the Super Bowl!

Philadelphia Eagles

Lessons on addressing, our government’s gift to you!

usps0

On Facebook? You’re probably signed up for a lesson on mailing a letter, paid for by the U.S. government, like the one above.

usps logo

I was a little out of it, last Thursday, told I was sounding stuffy, so I didn’t do much other than read. Part of that time was on Facebook rather than anything too important, although not entirely so.

I saw a sponsored ad from the U.S. Postal Service on how to mail a letter. (I thought the people in charge these days want smaller government and less spending.)

Donald Trump squeeze money

Their busiest time of the year is coming up. If you’re reading on the blog, you can see the countdown dates until Thanksgiving, Hanukkah, and Christmas — depending on the type of media you’re using (desktop, tablet or phone).

(Did you know Black Friday is an actual holiday in 24 states?)

countdowns

Hundreds of millions of Americans will be mailing cards and gifts, despite more and more substituting email for cards and shipping for gifts.

postal truck

We all want what we worked on and paid for to be delivered in a timely manner. I’m still waiting for a card from my mother from September that hasn’t arrived. It wasn’t her fault. She actually took it to the post office to make sure the correct amount of postage was on the envelope, and it had a return sticker.

money dollars cents

On the other hand, I’ve lived in my condo for more than a year and still get mail intended for previous residents of both sexes with various first and last names. Just last month, hundreds of our electric bills were returned to the management company!

That’s in addition to the latest problem that just started over the past few weeks: getting mail for 2501 and 2701 rather than 2601, with the four numbers after the ZIP code wrong.

mail3

mail2

mail1

That’s definitely human delivery error and should be eliminated, and I know that because the material was sent by professional companies with addresses typed in.

I’m sure the USPS wants to be considered as good by Santa (track him here) and the public, and stay in business for another year, so they apparently paid Facebook for advertising to teach readers the correct way to address an envelope, and which pitfalls to avoid.

Are any of these new to you? (I’ll let the experts tell you in their own words, since they paid for the opportunity.)

usps article

I know some people try to be fancy and cute, and that hurts the postal service’s performance. Did you know you should always address an envelope using capital letters, but not to use any punctuation except in the ZIP plus 4?

Maybe not.

Perhaps the USPS should have mailed every household and business a piece of paper with their suggestions, like they print and deliver when they hold food drives, because not everyone is on Facebook and not everyone is going to click their ad. I’m not sure about the price difference, and it would certainly mean more trees cut down, but it would also cut down on late and lost mail, which is also a waste.

ups fedex

Yes, there are private competitors that should be keeping the USPS on its toes to bring us better performance.

I’ve only rarely used the companies, like UPS and FedEx, mostly for mortgage paperwork when the envelopes were prepaid. I’m not sure they were any better than the post office and I had to go looking for a special box on the street to send them, rather than this.

us post office mailboxes

Choice is good. It should lower prices and improve service. But I for one would hate to see any, especially the USPS, go away.

usps old new

First, anyone who messes with your mailed letters and packages violates federal law and should go to jail. I’m not sure if the same applies to competitors like UPS and FedEx.

usps pkg

Second, there are post offices and mailboxes everywhere. Who doesn’t have a mailbox?

In my neighborhood, I keep hearing complaints from people in rowhomes outside my building about how their big packages with goods they ordered were stolen. That’s crooks disrupting the system.

And walking by, I see people’s notes on their doors about how packages should be delivered to the convenience store down the street in case nobody is home! That’s asking delivery people make two stops rather than one — slowing the process for everyone and making them work harder — and who says they have to, considering where their items were addressed?

usps amazon

And we want the post office to succeed, and deliver mail at least six days a week, so more workers can keep their jobs.

post office worker cartoon

But it can do better.

They closed many of Philadelphia’s post offices for the same hours for days throughout the Democratic National Convention in the summer of 2016. It was very inconvenient and I can’t come up with a good excuse. I’m sure the workers got paid. Most other government employees worked extra hard and got to collect overtime.

 

(No, John Kerry had already replaced the eventual presidential nominee as Secretary of State! As you well know, Hillary Clinton got nothing.)

hillary clinton

At least they lowered the price of a stamp by a penny so it’s an even better deal than it was before.

forever stamps

So do your part and address your items correctly.

One last word of advice: Don’t procrastinate. Give whatever company you use enough time to get your package to its correct destination in time. Click here for Holiday Shipping Deadlines. (They really only mean Christmas.)

Christmas Hanukkah

Good luck, happy holidays, and drive safely, and I mean that starting with Thanksgiving!

Thanksgiving

Oh wait. Look what just came up!

one last picture

Again, thanks to our tax money, and on the very edge of appropriateness for the USPS…

holiday staffing

So don’t be surprised if more government money in the form of “tips” makes its way to Facebook.

Beating Welch’s un-kosher coupon policy

coupon-circled

I don’t get shocked too much anymore.

Maybe that’s from age, or having done a lot of things in a lot of places. Maybe it’s from having been in the news and teaching fields, where you see and experience a lot.

But going through the weekly ads this week got me.

I’ve never seen “non-Kosher” as being a requirement on a coupon.

Sure, must buy two, only certain sizes, purchase before the expiration date. But non-Kosher?!

Welch’s, do you realize how you’re coming across?

You know the people who tend to buy products that are kosher and avoid those that aren’t. Obviously, they’re Jewish people. So it looks like you’re targeting Jews.

In other words, you don’t want people who keep kosher — meaning Jews — taking advantage of your lower prices.

Do you blatantly assume the stereotype all Jews are rich and can spend more money? Or are you just discriminating? Excluding? That doesn’t sound very American, especially now, when the country is polarized and everyone seems so touchy.

Of course, I don’t think that, but that is how it appears. No business is perfect.

Not the Center City Philadelphia restaurant that offers latkes (Jewish word for potato pancakes eaten during Hanukkah) with BACON as an appetizer.

latkes

Or the granddaddy of them all, the Hanukkah HAM at Walmart.

ham2                    ham1

As far as I’m concerned, you’re the company that had to be brought kicking and screaming to offer anything kosher.

Yes, you finally teamed up with Manischewitz a few years ago. (But I didn’t see their name on your bottles.)

bottles-front

I just used the search engine at the top of your website’s homepage to find “kosher” and got only three results, all recipes that require kosher salt!

search-kosher-salt

I did a computer search and found this…

blog-page

…but who would know or even consider 1. going to your navigation bar, 2. choosing Community, 3. then Blog, and 4. then hit ctrl-F to find “Passover” or “Manischewitz” (spelling it correctly) but not kosher? (Or just easily click http://www.welchs.com/our-community/the-official-welchs-blog/delicious-recipes-ideas-for-Passover.)

I don’t need to tell you kosher is big business and growing. You don’t need to tell me kosher items cost more. (I look at friends’ faces when I show them the price of kosher meat.)

Yes, there are rabbis and rules, and special rules for grapes.

But from what I’ve noticed, most major American food companies that sell nationally get most of their products certified kosher, except the ones with obvious ingredients that aren’t (like BACON and HAM).

history1

You’re a pretty big and old company, founded not far from a large Jewish community in Philadelphia and based near a large Jewish community in Boston.

bottles-side

Let me tell you: The prices for your juices at stores are the same, kosher or non-kosher. People just have to check the labels carefully.

The major supermarket I went to today sells your 46-ounce bottles for $3.99, but had them on sale for $2.99. Two of your coupons came this week, so I bought two bottles and saved $2 from the sale.receipt

And I used both coupons. They scanned on the store’s register just like any others. So I saved another $2 and paid just $1.99 each! That’s less than half price.

So maybe you did have a little point with your stereotype. Some of us are good shoppers.

But your company needs this lesson: It can and should know better and do better.