Not the typical pet, not the typical vet appointment

What a morning, and I hadn’t even gotten to the vet’s office!

morrisIt was time for Frisky’s first annual physical. That’s not counting the office visit she had a year ago, after I adopted her from Morris Animal Refuge on Clear the Shelters Day.

Frisky has always been a tough one. She was only four months old, which is extremely young to have had “the surgery” and be up for adoption – so I was told.

Her well-written bio read,

“I’m very mature for my age. I’m a Miss Smartypants. I’m going to be your favorite.”

friskys bio
Take out your resumes! How many of you have bios ready to go?
caseys baby pic
Casey’s baby picture, before we met

I didn’t grow up a cat person and had Casey for just about nine years at that point. When I got him at the Humane Society in Miami, I’d been told not to get a kitten but someone older, who knew how to be a cat.

Casey was seven months old. I didn’t even know cats could jump, and his timing with the camera was impeccable! My vocabulary wasn’t, with my then-five-year-old nephew Preston watching.

getting casey

Casey has been wonderful, moving with me from South Beach, to closer to my parents between Miami and Fort Lauderdale, to a Tennessee rental, then a Virginia house, to a Philadelphia rental and now our condo.

Casey’s first birthday and helping me grade papers.

The boy really knows how to take a catnap!

He taught me a lot about cats. I knew he could use company and he had so much to offer!

Casey on South Beach watching KYW’s Carol Erickson do the weather in Philadelphia, and having a good conversation with his grandmother.

So Clear the Shelters Day, 2017, sounded like the perfect (not “purr-fect” – I’m not like that!) opportunity to get him a little brother or sister, but I’d actually been thinking about it for a few years.

I’d asked around about getting a second cat and learned about keeping them in separate rooms until they got used to each other.

2017-08-29 casey frisky
Ten days after meeting

I was familiar with Morris through one of our Fox anchors, Lucy Noland. She hooked me up, and I got a tour and brought them donations. The funny part is, I lived two blocks away for two-and-a-half years (2001-2004) but never went inside!

clear the shelters

Anyway, Clear the Shelters Day is one of the busier days because the animals are free to good, loving homes. Just get to know each other, do some paperwork and bring a carrier if you’re taking a cat!

On Aug. 19, 2017, Pedro and I showed up, and it was like I was a kid in a crowded candy store.2017-08-19 Frisky morris animal 1

I told them what I was interested in, and they showed me where to look. It was a lot more cramped in Center City Philadelphia than a pretty new building in North Miami Beach.2017-08-19 Frisky morris animal 2

Others were looking but Frisky didn’t get much attention. I don’t know why. Maybe it was that others heard what I did, and she was only four months old.2017-08-19 Frisky morris animal 3

Anyway, she wasn’t very friendly. Maybe it was the ruckus going on. I can understand that! It took patience to get her to adjust, and she needed a little work on her eyes. (I don’t know her background.) She only recently started letting me pet her for more than a few seconds!

Last December, my parents visited and not only did Frisky steal food, she hid under the bed, waited for my frail mother to walk by, and then attacked her ankle when she did! She still goes after Pedro’s toes with her teeth. Luckily, I’ve long had a habit of wearing socks.

casey frisky variety

Now, Casey and Frisky are just like any other siblings!

On the other hand, years earlier in Miami, Casey and some other kittens were out on the floor at the Humane Society. The others were playing but Casey only wanted to be with me! That was an easy decision!

2017 casey birthday
One of Casey’s birthday cards, last year

(Truth be told, he started as KC. I changed the spelling. I wouldn’t confuse him with a name change.)

reading

Back to today.

I really had to fight to get Frisky into the carrying case. Fur was flying! She didn’t even care about the treats in the contraption.

I ended up with clothes looking white even though they weren’t, because of her hair, and scratches all over my arms from nails that had never been cut. (Last year, we forgot, and I couldn’t do it myself. Earlier tonight, my friend Ric mentioned I should’ve used a towel to hold her. Duh!)

Finally, I won.

We drove to the office and I signed her in. She listened to a big loud doggy wearing a satellite dish in the waiting room, who might have put her in her place. By then, after what I’d been through plus all that barking, all I was thinking about was Tylenol.

scale

The good news is Frisky weighs 9.5 lbs., which means she’s a big girl but not fat. (I don’t think she minds you knowing that, or her age for that matter.) Her teeth and everything else looked good, and she got three shots so quickly I didn’t even notice.

Oh, and she got her nails clipped for the first time! That’ll come in very handy when she’s in a mood.

Luckily, she didn’t have fleas. The doctor said he has been seeing them early and often this year, even in indoor cats.

But that wasn’t all.

post office

cleanser

We had to stop at the post office. Frisky came thisclose to getting mailed to her grandparents in Florida. I wonder if my mother would’ve signed for her.

Then, we walked to the Rite Aid across the street for a special cleanser for my arms. The doctor suggested it so I wouldn’t get cat scratch fever. (Frisky may be healthy, and Casey too, but they still have to step in their potty litter box.)

But it was great to overhear the doctor tell the technician all the way from where I was paying, “Awesome! What a healthy cat!”

That’s really what counts. Isn’t it?

blanket

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Grave situation for hours outside Detroit

Aug. 26, 2018 UPDATE: Grave marker raised and leveled, in early August. I may be back in a few weeks.

oakview cemetery

I don’t go on many vacations and didn’t plan to write a blog on this one, but the most unusual thing happened while trying to visit my grandfather’s grave at the cemetery in Royal Oak, Michigan.

Pedro and I had gone to Flint to visit, and for me to meet his family for the first time.2018 Grandpa Leos grave 1

We decided today, we would drive to Detroit and possibly visit an aquarium on the way back.

First stop was going to be visiting the grave of my Grandpa Leo, my father’s father who died in 1954. That means he lived 52 years and has been gone for 64. There wasn’t much warning. After that, my father moved to Florida, at 13, along with my Grandma Lillie and then my Aunt Diane.

I’ve been to the Oakview Cemetery twice before. First, I was with the family in 1989.

Then, I went by myself in 2001, while I was on a job interview and ended up getting offered the job to produce the 11:00 news at CBS-owned WWJ-Channel 62 in Detroit. Good thing I got the opportunity to stay in Philadelphia because not only did Channel 62 get rid of its newscasts, it also canceled the 10:00 news on its new sister-station WKBD-Channel 50, which was UPN and now The CW.

2018 Grandpa Leos grave 2

Anyway, I was with Pedro, his sister Olga, and their mother. We stopped off at the cemetery office and got directions to the grave. And we looked. And looked. And looked.

2018 Grandpa Leos grave 3No sign of the headstone.

I had some idea of the area and was able to find some cousins, the Coltons, but no sign of my grandfather. Eventually, Pedro called the cemetery office and a guy named Peter came out to try to help us find it. And he couldn’t.

Then, he called a woman from the office who has a good reputation for finding missing graves. She was able to locate some stone markers but they’d been covered with dirt and were very dry, so we had trouble reading them.

Eventually, we figured out numbers 85, 86 and 87 in the area. I went to the place and started digging with my fingers, trying to find grave number 1 in the right section.

And there it was, under at least four inches of dirt! There were others completely covered, and pretty deep, as well.2018 Grandpa Leos grave 4

Uncovering all the dirt wasn’t easy. Pedro found some sticks that we used to try to get the dirt off the headstone. Even his elderly mother was on the ground, pulling grass out of the way!

Finally, the cemetery people called a worker with a shovel to lift the stone up a few inches.

We had baby wipes in the car and used those to clean the stone, and were finally able to read it clearly.

Peter said he put a work order in and tomorrow morning, the stone should have extra dirt underneath to keep it above ground. Pedro and I have a few more days here and will fly out of Detroit, so we’ll probably be back to check.

finding Grandpa Leos grave

This just goes to show what regular visits to cemeteries mean. They’re supposed to provide perpetual care, but how do you know? How often do you visit?

Mother’s Day and Father’s Day are popular. So are birthdays, anniversaries and Memorial Day. The time between Rosh Hashanah and Yom Kippur for Jews.

Of course, it’s not easy traveling from Philadelphia to Michigan, or my family from Miami to Michigan. What about all the people in Florida with loved ones buried in New York?

Grandpa Leos grave
The third line is his Hebrew name and his father’s. The fourth is the date of death on the Hebrew calendar.

The decision to have my Grandpa Leo buried at that location was made many years ago. Then came the decision to move to Florida, and my Grandma Lillie died and was buried down south in 1976. She has an upright headstone. He has a flat one. Times changed a lot in those almost 20 years, and there’s nothing I can do — or have the right to do — to change anything.

It gets me thinking that people have to decide what they want, and make sure their wishes are known, and will be followed. And also make sure the money is there.

2018 after cemetery

Thanks to Pedro, his sister and their mother for digging, patience and other help with the search. And I’m sorry that what should’ve been a 15-20 minute stop, including directions at the office, turned into a two-hour ordeal.

Please, don’t miss out. If you like what you read here, subscribe to CohenConnect.com with either your email address or WordPress account, and get a notice whenever I publish. I’m also available for writing/web contract work.