bathroom

Sometimes, interesting things happen when you read friends’ Facebook pages. I’m not talking about going to look on purpose, which I’ve done before. I’m just referring to seeing something on your news feed and clicking on it. That got me, as the title clearly says, banned from Facebook pages twice in 2 days! The one I care about is a longtime friend I used to respect, but there’s also the radio talk show host full of hate who I’d never heard of until last night.

I may feel bad about one, but can’t regret either.

Regular readers know I don’t like Facebook and friends are leaving it over privacy issues. I personally have concerns over its business practices and censorship (and lack-of when it comes to Holocaust denial). Many business people say 2019 will not be a good year for Facebook. I hope they’re right. The company deserves that.

But in just over the past month, Facebook revealed the truth about people like Philadelphia Mayor Jim Kenney’s executive director of his Office of LGBT Affairs, Amber Hikes (divisiveness and profanity) and Havertown resident Brad Foden (very close to being a neo-Nazi, if not already one).

By the way, I got no responses from any of them about my blog posts. I never contacted Foden, and I stopped trying with Kenney and Hikes after learning Kenney’s father died almost a month ago. It’s never my goal to make matters worse during a person’s time of grief, but I had asked both of them for answers several times and neither (nor staff members) bothered to get back to me at all, like decent public servants.

Think of those phrases about aging, and how the older you get, the less you care what people think of you. I’m getting there.

So just a warning: Don’t be surprised if I go after you because you can’t behave like a civilized human being.

And another warning: This next part of the post may not be appropriate for children due to cursing, not the subject matter.

Case in point: a Buffalo hypnotist and radio talk show host who actually spends a lot of time at his home near St. Petersburg, Fla. A friend of mine was a Facebook friend of his until last night.

My friend posted this article from the Daily Mail which showed a MTF transgender person at a GameStop store in New Mexico very angry.

According to the article,

“The woman had just bought an item at the counter.”

Then,

“She demanded her money back after being called ‘sir’ by the male shop attendant, then raged at a fellow shopper who called her ‘sir’ again and asked her to stop swearing as there were children present.”

I don’t know what really happened. The article admits,

“The clip began with the woman already at boiling point.”

Also,

“She complained of being repeatedly misgendered by the store clerk and demanded to have the company’s corporate number in order to make a complaint,”

and it said,

“She aggressively pointed at the clerk as he repeatedly apologized.”

Personally, I wonder why either “sir” or “ma’am” had to be used when a genuinely friendly smile and good customer service should make anyone happy. Less is more!

Transitioning is tough. Nobody can snap their fingers and become the gender they feel they were born to be. There are medical issues, getting experience being “out” as the other gender, and possibly surgeries. That’s plural, for obvious reasons. And don’t forget legal issues over identity. Plus, have some compassion!

Click here for GLAAD’s Transgender Media Program, here for FAQ, here for basic terminology, and here for tips in a list that

“is not exhaustive and cannot include all the ‘right’ things to do or say because often there is no one ‘right’ answer to every situation you might encounter.”

Here are two highlights:

“Transgender people use many different terms to describe their experiences,”

and

“Some transgender and gender non-conforming people may not feel like they match the signs on the restroom door,”

which is why single user, unisex options should be available.

In Philadelphia, according to BillyPenn.com, that’s pretty-much the law!

“Any entity that owns or leases a structure open to the general public, including but not limited to Retail Establishments and City-owned buildings, that currently has or at any time establishes one or more single-occupancy bathroom facilities for public use, shall provide Gender-neutral Signage for such facilities.

An entity that has bathroom facilities with gender usage indicated by art work or design may, if such designs predate the effective date of this Ordinance, retain such designs, provided that they use signage that clearly indicates that the bathroom may be used by any person or persons, regardless of gender identity.”

In other words, quoting from BillyPenn.com:

• For the past three years, businesses with single-occupancy restrooms must post signs showing they’re gender-neutral,
• all new city buildings must be built with gender-neutral bathrooms included in the plans, and
• in cases of no single-occupancy restrooms, transgender individuals can use whichever bathroom the person feels most comfortable in.

My friend’s Facebook post didn’t make me happy. I should note he’s a Florida Republican, but I think the post was a lot better than it would’ve been if we hadn’t started discussing the issue a while back.

Then, the responses piled up.

In the middle, you can see what I wrote. I don’t know the type of day that person was having, so I’m not going to make judgments about anything other than her creating a very bad scene.

Then I went on to give facts from the American Medical Association to the uneducated, or simply people who don’t know anyone in the situation.

Click here for the AMA’s “Policies on Lesbian, Gay, Bisexual, Transgender & Queer (LGBTQ) issues,” which starts by saying it

“supports the equal rights, privileges and freedom of all individuals and opposes discrimination based on sex, sexual orientation, gender identity, race, religion, disability, ethnic origin, national origin or age.

Sexual orientation and gender identity are integral aspects of the AMA communities and AMA policies on LGBTQ issues that work to inform individuals about LGBTQ discrimination and abuse. AMA’s policies for lesbian, gay, bisexual and transgender people’s rights represent a multiplicity of identities and issues.”

The response was disappointing. The world is a changing place and there’s too much hate here in America already.

Last night, the person a Buffalo hypnotist and radio talk show host I referred to above wrote on the same string I started with information from the AMA that he doesn’t like transgendered (sic) people and they all need help, or something to that effect. I can’t quote exactly, because we had an exchange, he lost the discussion, got angry, deleted the posts, and blocked me. Note: That’s all his fault, especially not being able to quote him exactly!

Keep in mind, his radio gig is Saturday mornings, and the big promotional teases of energy and controversy have been around for decades. Any idiot can speak into a microphone (or telephone from Florida) and say stupid things. This is just one example.

I wrote up a six-part Twitter story with evidence on what happened on Facebook. Click the pictures that were cut off to see them in full. (Don’t forget, you can see my Twitter posts on the side of bottom of this website. I haven’t blocked anybody.)

He started by addressing the word all, but killed that post and others, or blocked me, before I saw any of it. Luckily, Facebook emailed to say he mentioned me.

I have no idea why he’d call me “a liberal snowflake,” believe I don’t like Sean Hannity (but he’s right on that one), or insist I don’t study. Where did that come from?

Click here for the article.

So there you have it: The truth about Robert Saviola. I wonder which other groups of people he hates.

Notice I used his Twitter handle in every post. He apparently hasn’t used Twitter since 2014. So much for business and promotion! You’ll also see the radio station’s handle on every post. Hopefully they’ll rethink his employment.

Next is a friend I met 20 years ago, when I moved to Philadelphia. He’s a retired high school math teacher who helped found the former gay synagogue, which has since merged with the big Reform one.

The funny thing is, he’d probably agree on everything I wrote above. The problem is I didn’t agree 100 percent with something he posted yesterday.

He was obviously watching CNN’s New Year’s Eve coverage and was happy about what he saw. So were other people.

But media is my field, and we’re both former teachers, which should mean we have higher standards.

Yesterday, I commented like other friends on his post. First, I explained there has been tremendous “progress in LGBTQ rights” but there are also threats.

Then, there’s CNN, which doesn’t have the best reputation these days. I included this story about the very broadcast he was referring to.

Today, he I saw he’d responded to my post that I didn’t get it, but he didn’t bother to explain. Some teacher!

Then, with the media knowledge I have and he lacks, I explained about the people he referenced:

• Andy Cohen (no relation) does nothing for me, actually works for Bravo (NBC) and SiriusXM, was just moonlighting with CNN for the night, and was responsible for this article.
• I worked with Don Lemon and ran into him at Woody’s, many years ago. Need I explain his reputation, these days? In fact, this article is from today!
• Richard Quest is most famous for his accent and his unusual arrest. (Warning: British accents are OK for children but details of Quest’s arrest are definitely not!)
• At least Anderson Cooper, a respectable journalist, has been nicer to people when he’s off camera than he has been in the past, so I’ve heard.

That’s when the conversation turned to email.

HE EMAILED: “You are over analyzing a totally innocent comment of mine. In my childhood, I saw no openly gay peeps on any TV. 50 years later there are 4 on national TV at the same time. End of story. Has nothing to do with ratings, personal role models, reputations, etc. The others who saw my post totally got it.”

I EMAILED: “Maybe ‘the others’ are older but ‘being there’ shouldn’t cut it in 2018/9.”

HE EMAILED: “Lenny…you and I will have to agree to disagree…you continue to miss my point. You are taking my feeling of joy and amazement and shitting on it.”

As if that was my intention! Keep in mind this was a discussion with a former high school math teacher who was a longtime friend.

I EMAILED: “If ‘ooh, ahh’ does it for you, then enjoy.”

HE EMAILED: “If you feel so strongly, please post your opinions on your own FB page. It’s really not polite to use someone else’s page for your personal platform.”

First, I didn’t watch. I had nothing to post; just a response to his thought like several other Facebook friends of his. That’s how Facebook works!

And keep in mind, I wrote two posts: one on his original, yesterday – and another on his response which I noticed today.

Then I emailed longer:

“I’m sorry. I didn’t watch or bring it up. I just happened to see it on my friend’s timeline (like others did), and shared my thoughts (as others did).

‘It’s really not polite to use someone else’s page for your personal platform.’

Are you trying to silence me because my thought was different?

That wouldn’t be very liberal. I don’t think the ACLU would agree. Most Americans would say I’m entitled to my opinion.

I have plenty of other things to do than add to the discussion. I only did so today because I saw you responded. (Do you think you should’ve taken a moment to explain your response yesterday?)

I’m sorry if you can’t handle so many different thoughts and opinions around the country and the world, but they exist.”

That’s when I realized posts were missing.

“Yes, _____. Censorship is the answer. That’s what the right says about the left and you’ve proven them correct!

I gave the facts and you can’t disprove me. I also explained why.

I also taught the person who wanted to know about lesbians at NBC. I hope that person saw the answer, along with the Philadelphia connection, before you recklessly killed that post.

You ought to be ashamed, thinking Facebook is only for people who agree with you blindly. So much for the exchange of ideas!”

I had realized somebody asked a question and I answered it. I hope they read about Stephanie Gosk and wife Jenna Wolfe, along with her Philadelphia connection as weekend sports anchor on the former WB17 News at 10, before it was deleted from that string! Make that a grand total of *three* Facebook posts I made!

And then I realized he had the nerve to block me!

“This is too much. And then blocking me from your Facebook page when I didn’t insult anyone you know, but simply told the truth about famous people you mentioned!

I don’t think they deserve medals for being gay. I think we should be proud if they do their jobs well, are role models (as I mentioned since we’re both former teachers), and inspire the next generation.

This proves my original point. I expect more from people I rely on for news than just ‘being there’ and the same goes for people I associate with. You don’t qualify.

You’ve shown you don’t care to discuss anything, exchange ideas, or maybe even learn about someone else’s profession. It’s people like you who cause others to #WalkAway.”

He added this post to the bottom of his, as if to apologize for me.

He’s more like the people in these two videos than he realizes!

The vape guy who wouldn’t sell was fired. And by the way, there should be “No Recording” signs at the entrance if it’s not allowed. Without a sign, the person recording should stop at the point they’re told to stop.

My former friend is more like the vape guy than he realizes. I don’t know what caused him to overreact the way he did. Maybe it was a ‘senior moment.’ Maybe he’s stressed. Regardless, I certainly didn’t deserve it. I’m not a student of his and he can’t play dictator with me. I’ve known him for two decades and earned the respect to have my opinion treated with respect. Especially since I still think I’m right!

I should point out CNN’s New Year’s Eve coverage beat Fox News Channel and MSNBC’s. Maybe more Americans felt it was the least of the cable evils.

Unfortunately, it’s hard to compare cable ratings with broadcast ratings since I can’t find the number of viewers vs. number of viewers, or ratings points (households or demographics) that can be compared. I looked all over but used Deadline magazine as my source for both broadcast and cable numbers because it was the closest I could find.

So those are two of my Facebook experiences over the past 24 hours. I can only wait for the second story to haunt me but I didn’t cause it, I wasn’t the one who started getting rude, I didn’t name a name even though many people will easily figure it out, and I told the truth as usual.

His loss. I do hope this post isn’t used against me, but it’s a risk I’m willing to take. As I mentioned with Dr. Seuss before, I’m not going to live by what others think.

By the way, my year-end post is on its way. Lots of updates! For that delay, and only that, I APOLOGIZE!

• Parkland now, but North Miami Beach proud!  Feb. 23, 2018
• Flakes and facts, lots on my mind  March 7, 2018
• Facebook: Friend or foe? Keep or delete?  March 26, 2018
• Who Trump hates more, Facebook or Amazon? Oh, and Stormy Daniels’ motion to make him speak!  March 29, 2018
• Distorting history, stirring up stereotypes  April 10, 2018
• Who says everything I write is negative (but correct)?  April 25, 2018
• In defense of Emma González, not that she needs it but deserves it  May 2, 2018
• In defense: The good Facebook can do when used by the right people  May 13, 2018
• You may be right but don’t let some on the left know (and vice versa)!  July 15, 2018
• More moderation in politics, not so in casting calls  July 17, 2018
• Labor Day weekend leftovers  Sept. 3, 2018
• News starting out good but going downhill fast  Oct. 2, 2018
• Political pondering, 3 weeks before Election Day  Oct. 16, 2018
• Not a good day for political thoughts, the USA as a whole  Oct. 28, 2018
• Difficult week, from anger to sadness, as election approaches  Nov. 4, 2018
• The end of an era, and beginning of this one (Part A of this one)  Nov. 21, 2018
• Level-headed moderation needed now in The Birthplace of America  Nov. 28, 2018
• Exposing hate, close to home (as if acceptable anywhere)  Dec. 12, 2018

If you appreciate what you read here, subscribe with either your email address or WordPress account, and get a notice whenever I publish. Don’t rely on social media with its hacking issues and censoring like this, this and this. I just became certified as an IT Support Specialist and am also available for writing/web contract work. LinkedIn: https://www.linkedin.com/in/lennycohen